Here's a thing. I had a couple of hours to myself on Friday night so, after the moment I had last week, I decided to go for some good ol' divination. I cleaned and smudged the living room, lit a fire, brought out some crystals to amplify the vibe (shut up, I'm using that word) and chose my favourite card decks to play with.
I had questions. Questions I worded very carefully and wrote out before pulling cards (see new stationery, above). Using both recommended texts and my own intuition to read the responses, I found a strong theme through them all.
I need to attend to the feminine, feel the power that lives there, utilise it, create with it.
This is not an easy thing for me. My old stories have me reject and withdraw from an early interpretation of 'feminine' based purely on a mother who is chalk to my non-dairy cheese. She is charm and voluptuousness, flirtation and 'Oh don't ask me I'm not very bright', all about the old school 'girlishness'. I was androgyny and three brothers, a life in jeans and trees, and a flat out refusal to take part in anything old school 'girlish'. I went to dance classes but dreamed of being Fred Astaire, not Margot Fonteyn.
Here I am now, living a life that is soaked in and rich with the feminine principles of nurturing, motherhood, creativity, connection with Mother Earth, home-making and my maverick hedgewitchery. Journeys and dreams filled with antler-bearing hinds wearing crowns, and the silent, black she-wolf who whispers,'You are like me. Never forget.' through her amber-eyed stare.
I haven't forgotten. Now it seems it's time to bring that memory into the light.